A Picture

i really wanted to become a millionaire, all I would need is someone to agree to give me one penny every time I wished i had my camera with me when I didn't. It would be completely ridiculous for me, knowing me, to carry my expensive camera around with me everywhere seeing as how I cannot seem to hold onto a cell phone for more than a weeks time. so sometimes i just have to take pictures in my mind, store them somewhere safe away in my heart & find peace in knowing that these are the pictures I will carry with me forever.

Today we went as a family to the Christmas Parade, I go to grab my camera as we head out the door & realize that my memory card is with my sister & we have no time to stop and get a new one. While I am usually very disappointed when I can't bring my camera somewhere there are sure to be thousands of opportunities for beautiful pictures, it can sometimes be a relief as well. You see, when you are constantly behind the camera it makes it difficult to enjoy the moment as it is happening. Sure, you can always go back and look at your pictures to remind yourself you were there, but being camera free can open up the ability to actually be fully present. So while I sadly lock the door to my house at the prospect of missing so many candind moments, I remind myself that today I will be taking pictures with my heart and that brings a smile to my face before loading up the car.

I promised myself that this blog was going to be all about pictures, not all about being a mom, which is absolutely my goal with A Thousand Words. However being a creative person I am forced to write about what is on my mind and today it happens to be about my family.

I don't have a picture to share with you about this really wonderful morning, other than to paint one for you in your mind. Here we are, Jon & I, pushing a stroller both sipping on our dunkin donuts coffee, trying to find the perfect place to perch and watch the parade. Being first time parade attenders, we were not aware that arriving early to get a good seat means arriving a full hour, instead of the mere 30 mins we were proud of ourselves for. All of the front row seats were filled along Hillsborough Street, so we nudge ourselves into a cozy little spot at the West street intersection. The nightclub flyers along the ground only serve as a mini reminder of how much has changed for us in the past two years.

A cold 30 minutes later the parade begins & I watch my little one in his daddy's arms to see if this trip was worth it at all. Dylan is a little young to really understand a parade and this being the middle of his normal nap time I was sure a meltdown was going to occur in place of the parade. To my surprise Dylan was mezmorized by the marching bands, floats & little children that surrounded us. He actually lasted almost the entire parade, mommy & daddy switching off baby every 10 minutes or so as our arms started to fall asleep from holding him up so long.

As I had suspected, there were many moments that would have made beautiful pictures and I tried my best to ignore the tiny pinches of envy I felt for all the people around me with their cameras. Most of them snapping away mindlessly, I reminded myself not to be a camera snob and pay attention to the parade. And then I caught it, the picture that would have been worth a thousand words. My baby, exhausted from the excitment, with his head laying on my husbands shoulder - tucked comfortably under daddy's chin. The marching band was walking by in the background, but my eyes were on my two boys & I knew right then this was an image that would last with me in my mind as long as I lived. I would probably flash back to this moment 25 years from now as I am dancing with my son at his wedding. I may not be able to frame it, or post it on any blogs, but this picture in my mind is worth more than a thousand words and its a picture I will treasure forever.